An Answer to a Friend's Question: "Do you love him?"

"Do you love him?"

One of our common friends asked me this question way back when my husband, Jay, and I were still in a boyfriend-girlfriend status.  I do not actually know the reason why he asked it, maybe because he knew that both of us were having relationship troubles before we got together.  I was left hanging in the air by my former boyfriend (and later I found out that he was already dating another girl) and my husband was feeling rejected by the girl he was courting.  Maybe our common friend just wanted to make sure that Jay and I are being together for the right reasons.

So, I answered him through my Friendster blog.  But since blogs in Friendster are already gone, I'd be happy to share to you my answers in this blog.

Enjoy reading!

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"Do you love him?"

Yes, I do.  I love Jay.  No hesitations.  No doubt.  No regrets.  How would you know if you really love a person?  Do you feel it or do you decide on it?  Is it supposed to come from the heart or from the head? I had this belief before that love is both a feeling and a decision.  But when Jay came along, I realized that love is more than a result of emotion and rationalization.  Love is a complete celebration of another  being's personhood.  It is wholeheartedly bringing out the best in one person.  It is being an inspiration for someone to reach his or her dreams.  It is God's instrument to provide hope, joy, and endless faith, not only for yourself, but for someone else.  It is being happy for another person's happiness, even though it means you're not a part of it, because you know that in the end, you would be happy anyway.

Love is not all about "me".  But mostly about "him' or "her".

An Answered Prayer (A Love Story)

(I originally submitted this article to my friend's blog, A Match Made in Heaven, for her Featured Couple Love Stories in 2010. I am re-blogging the article (and editing some typo's) in this blog site to re-tell a Love Story I would never forget. A Love Story I would like to read over and over again. My husband and I's Love Story).

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The right person comes at the right place...at the right time...when both your hearts are ready to be with each other...and with the blessings from God.

At the right place...

I attended the seminar training on 2006 at DLSU-SPACE (a school for short courses/training education) because I really wanted to take the course. Jay attended the same seminar training on the same scheduled date and place because he was required to attend but he was never excited to participate in the seminar. His motivation to attend was because he was courting his officemate who was also required to take the class. We both worked in different companies and we both had different purposes for being part of the seminar but our lives became unexpectedly connected because of it. We were just plain seminar classmates back then...but now, we are much more than just classmates for life.

At the right time...

Romance to Keep, Stories to Share

It has been months since I created this blog, but I actually had no posts made until now.

Maybe because it's not the inspiration or the motivation alone.  Blogging about our stories and lessons as a married couple also serves as a reminder for ourselves to hold on and have faith in our love even though challenges come our way.

Princes and princesses of  fairy tales often end up being wed to each other and live happily ever after--- and, admit it or not, that was also our conception of marriage long before we say "I do" to our better half.  We thought that once we got married, the rest of our lives would be like magic, sprinkled with happiness.  But later we would know that the wedding is just the start of a whole new chapter in our lives.  New challenges, new responsibilities, and new experiences and lessons in life are yet to come.

My husband and I are already married for four years and we have a four year old daughter. Four years but we still consider ourselves as newly weds. We're still in the process of strengthening our marriage. Challenges have started to shake us and we are continuously holding on to each other to prevent us from falling apart.  So far, we manage to keep our marriage intact and the romance alive.

We are currently in a long distance relationship.  My husband has been in an official business travel for almost two years in United States (I'm now in the Philippines, our home country).  He comes back for a short two-week vacation every six months.  This set up has somehow stirred my sanity.  Never in my whole life I thought of having a long distance marriage.  I was never prepared for this.  But, well, it came.  So now I am dealing with it.  I still wanted us to have a healthy relationship even though we are far apart from each other.

Because of our situation, I thought that blogging could be a way to always remind myself to hold on to our love, especially when I'm troubled, lost and lonely.  This could also be a means to remind you and other readers to always have faith and believe in love.  Our own fairy tales begin with love and end with love.  But in between, we have to work, strengthen and believe in that love.

May this blog be a food for each of our hungry hearts.  May this blog be a food nutritious enough to feed our souls and spirits so we may be able to have the inspiration and motivation to keep the romance alive in our marriages. May this blog be a food that would make our love for our partners strong at all times.